Many, many moons ago, J and I were on vacation, and we stayed at an inn with a very fancy coffee machine. Push one button and a latte came out. This was years before the creation of those wasteful K-cup machines, the detritus of which are now occupying our landfills. The machine used real coffee beans, ground freshly for each cup, and real milk, steamed. The result was a hot, fresh latte.
J. loves her coffee. She has only one a day, but that one coffee wakes her up and gets her moving. Coffee is a critical part of her morning ritual. Knowing how tickled she was by this machine–she broke her one-cup rule while we were there–I decided to buy her one. It was an extravagant purchase, and trust me we are not extravagant people, but over the years it has saved us thousands of dollars in coffee shop visits. And this gift was the ultimate in self sacrifice because I don’t even drink coffee, except on special occasions.
Not only did I buy the machine, I got it into the house without J.’s realizing and set it up so she would wake up to it on our anniversary. I even tried to watch the instructional videos that came with it (that’s how old it is) so I could instruct her in making the perfect cup of coffee. I managed to pull all this off without J.’s knowing a thing.
This machine is J.’s baby. She won’t let anyone touch it; I have to put in an order with her if I want a coffee. She pouts when she can’t take it with her on vacation, and rejoices when she is reunited with it upon our return. In fact, she told me after she received it that I had reached the apex of gift giving with this gift and would never have to aspire to such heights again.
Now, if you know me and you know J., you realize the significance of “without J. knowing”. J. always knows everything. She’s got the mind of a detective. And I have a complete inability to lie without detection, so I can’t get anything past her, ever. Often I sabotage myself because I get so excited, I can’t hold the secret in. Or I think J.’s figured out my surprise from all the clues I’ve left, so I just tell her, when in fact she had absolutely no idea.
I’m telling you all this because I need your help badly. I have come up with the perfect birthday gift for J., but her birthday is not until late April. I will have to keep this secret for weeks. A certain amount of subterfuge will be needed in order for me to pull this off. I would tell you what the gift is, but unfortunately, J. follows my blog, and I can’t really ask her to skip any of my scintillating posts.
So, in the meantime, I desperately need your help. Could you please send along your best secret-keeping tips? The closer her birthday gets, the more desperate I’ll be. I need a strategy to get me through. Thanks for your help, yet again. I know I’m asking an awful lot of you guys lately.